Today I was taking part in a leadership course. It was an emotionally draining course as it focussed a lot on how you are perceived by others, and how to project a positive image to the world.
I already had an idea of what people think, but I was surprised to learn that not only did they not notice my weight, they did notice my lack of self-confidence. It's humbling.
My coping mechanisms thus far has been to make fun of myself before anyone gets the chance to judge me or say anything nasty.............basically take their amo away. The problem with this is that that was in my head. Because I judge myself so harshly, I believe everybody else is too.
I had a headache about half way through, and I think my attitude became a bit lacklustre. I felt down. I felt defeated. I felt bad.
And again - it's not that anything bad was said to me. It was my inner critic having a party.
Look how far you've dropped, look how far you have to go. You are such a useless person.
That inner critic is just a bully, isn't it?
The mediator looked at me at one point and said..............don't eat the elephant. And yeah. I do that. I want to fix the whole problem in one shot, but this is not a problem to fix in one shot.
So, this girl is going to start on the elephant tail. Just one bite.
Get healthy. It influences how I see myself and how i feel about myself. If I can get positive energy back into my life, I think the other items (feet, ears, head, trunk) will be easier to digest.
Humbling day.
I already had an idea of what people think, but I was surprised to learn that not only did they not notice my weight, they did notice my lack of self-confidence. It's humbling.
My coping mechanisms thus far has been to make fun of myself before anyone gets the chance to judge me or say anything nasty.............basically take their amo away. The problem with this is that that was in my head. Because I judge myself so harshly, I believe everybody else is too.
I had a headache about half way through, and I think my attitude became a bit lacklustre. I felt down. I felt defeated. I felt bad.
And again - it's not that anything bad was said to me. It was my inner critic having a party.
Look how far you've dropped, look how far you have to go. You are such a useless person.
That inner critic is just a bully, isn't it?
The mediator looked at me at one point and said..............don't eat the elephant. And yeah. I do that. I want to fix the whole problem in one shot, but this is not a problem to fix in one shot.
So, this girl is going to start on the elephant tail. Just one bite.
Get healthy. It influences how I see myself and how i feel about myself. If I can get positive energy back into my life, I think the other items (feet, ears, head, trunk) will be easier to digest.
Humbling day.
